Monday, March 1, 2010

I (Janet) messed up yesterday

I can still feel the shame on my face yesterday as I was not using my patience with Marvin. I know some things factored in to my behavior but their was no excuse and I am really embarrassed. I had been extremely exhausted during the weekend and along with my allergies both my hands ached both Saturday and Sunday. We ran our errands on Saturday and did our normal weekend chores on Saturday. Sunday morning it was time for worship at 8:15, after church we ran home for a bit and then we they ran to get a bite to eat (because I was craving fish) and then I went to a baby shower at 1:30. By the time I got home around 3:45 I was really achy. I tried to open the automatic garage door and it would not work. This is where my patience grew thin. Marvin had just programmed his built in cars remote and now all of a sudden my SUV built in car remote and the 2 other remotes would not work. I was trying to read in the manual when Marvin kept interrupting me and telling me I did not know what I was doing. That is all that it took and I yelled at him to do it himself. I went in the house to lay down. I thought I just needed to rest (more like a timeout) but no I could not even rest because our new neighbors (4 young men) had their music blaring and my house was feeling the beat. So I got up out of bed and asked Marvin if he wanted me to go over and talk to them or was he going to do it? He said he would. What was whirling through my mind at that point was Lynnette's BLOG where she had this experience of a unkind message on her BLOG. She felt like God kept her from being angry. She handled the response was grace and kindness.
Since we were going to be in the backyard grilling out Marvin just talked to the kids over the fence. The shameful part that he said to them that stopped me in my tracks were (you don't want to upset my wife) I hate that I have been known like that. I don't want to be that person. I want to follow Lynnette's example and handle issues through grace and kindness. So no more excuses. I have been working on my patience for a long time. Please pray for me.


Sister Susie said...

Prayers are being lifted. It sounds like many things were "stacking" up that don't normally do so. It seems to have been one of those days. We all have them. I must admit, your patience lasted longer than mine would have! Sometimes we have to let it out. I go by myself and just start talking, and talking about what I don't like that is bothering me. By myself, I rant and rave to myself. When I come back out, my dogs are looking at me like, "Is this my owner?" lol!
They even walk away not knowing if they should wag their tails or not. lol!
I hope all is much better for you today.
Hugs for hurts,

Janet said...

Thanks Susie...It was a well learned lesson.

Blessings & Hugs

Nellie's Cozy place said...

Hi Janet,
Don't be quite so hard on yourself hon. At least you admit you have a problem in this area and are working on it, some people don't even see they have a problem! Will certainly pray for you, just remember everybody has something they need to work on always!! God's perfecting process. We are all fallen people in need of much help, to say the least!! lol
Even tho someone else has great patience they might have a problem with unforgiveness that you don't have or selfishness or whatever.
God rigged it where we are all different and have different issues to work thru. Proud of you for owning up to it tho. God says if we confess our sin he is faithful to forgive us and cleanse us, so there you go!! You are on your way to more patience already.
Have a wonderfully patient day!!
Blessings hon, Nellie